What is Low Self-Esteem?
Self Esteem is a term used to describe the way we feel about ourselves. The value we attribute to our own ideas, abilities, and physical appearance influence our overall self-worth. In the absence of self-worth lies social avoidance, increased anxiety, and an inability to make decisions on one's own.
Signs of Low Self-Esteem:
- Negative Perceived Judgement: Anticipating negative evaluation from others.
(i.e. "My new classmates will think I'm not smart") - Self-doubt with opinions and ideas
(i.e. "This idea is too embarrassing to share") - Repeated negative thoughts about oneself
(i.e. "I'll never be good enough") - Fearful of making a mistake
(i.e. "If I mess up this order, my coworkers will think I'm incompetent" - Avoiding situations that may show their perceived incapabilities.
(i.e. "I won't dance at the wedding because I am a bad dancer") - Devaluing of Self
(i.e. "Who would want to hire me anyway?" - Tendency to compare oneself with others
(i.e. "My sister is naturally gifted at math, I am terrible at it")
Balanced Self-Esteem
An overabundance of self-esteem leaves an individual with overestimated capabilities, high incompetence, and a sense of entitlement that comes off as self-unaware. That's why it's important to view self-esteem as a spectrum ranging from low to high- with the goal being on the 50% mark.
With such a fine line to tread, what are the characteristics of balanced self-esteem?
- Knows the difference between confidence and arrogance
- Is not afraid of feedback
- Does not people-please or seek approval
- Is not afraid of conflict
- Is able to set boundaries
- Is able to voice needs and opinions
- Is assertive, but not pushy
- Is not afraid of setbacks
- Does not fear failure
- Does not feel inferior
- Accepts who they are
Personality Traits Connected To Low Self-Esteem:
Confidence (Low)
- doubts one's own abilities and capacities
- anticipate negative evaluation from others
- repeated negative thoughts about oneself
- fearful of making a mistake and tendency to avoid situations which can show their incapability
- do not try to fulfill their goals/desires as it may show their incapability
- tendency to compare oneself with others
- tendency to focus on their negatives rather than positives
- are unable to weigh between their positives and negatives to determine their overall identity
Prefectionism (High)
- Detail-oriented
- Noticing errors
- Making lists alleviate stress
- High standards for oneself (and sometimes others)
- Excessive planning
- Feeling disconcerted when things don't go according to plan
Nervousness (High)
- Persistent sense of uneasiness
- Anxiety/ Panic
- Avoiding unfamiliar people, places, and ecperiences
- Avoiding responsibilities
- Noticing threats in their environment
- Noticing threatening behavior